Ok. So it's been a week since I've been back here in Aus. Eurgh.
So now I'm sitting here in my new boarding school. I've been here for a couple of hours already and now I'm starting to wonder WHAT AM I DOING HERE????? Is this really the right choice? Do you know what sticking out like a really sore, swollen, bruised, purple thumb with an overgrown nail means? That's me. Because my school (this new one) and this boarding house doesn't accept international students. So I'm basically the ONLY Asian here. Pfft what do you mean 'basically'? I AM. I'm really freaking out.
Let's leave it there for now. Pam's here. More next time. Going to try to be normal and relax.
Pfft.
Sunday, July 18, 2010
Great Land!
Hey! If you didn't know, I'm back home! HOME! Do you understand what that word means? It's where I am now! How lame.
Ok. Here're just some random statements and stuff about being back, some of which I only realize when I take a step back and really look and see. Enjoy!
I have to get used to sweating now. I'm so not used to it that when I sweat, I think it's hot. I can't play volleyball much or stay out in the sun much because the moment I start sweating, I'm saying that it's too hot when it's actually just normal temperature.
I love the heat. Well, not so much the heat itself. More like the fact that I'm wearing shorts and a t-shirt. When I was packing I almost forgot to pack my thongs (flip-flops! Not underwear!) because I haven't worn them in AGES (too cold). But I am undoubtedly not that used to it anymore. I used to be able to wear long-sleeved shirts here no problem. But now I can't imagine it AT ALL.
I love the whatever-you-call-it culture here. How friends and friends meet up for supper, have a cup of teh tarik and a packet of nasi lemak. How families go out for supper, have some roti kahwin and milo bing gao. How they just sit there for an hour or so and just chat and chat, in the ever-bustling shop, in the stuffy heat.
I have to get used to the fact that toilet paper is not provided here.
I love the soft thrumming of the ceiling fans as they turn. Together with the heat, they perfect the feel of home.
I am amazed at how it feels like it's been absolutely forever since I've been in my home. And how things have stayed the same, how I hardly think about my home when I'm down under, how familiar yet unfamiliar it seems. Amazed.
I feel like I'm somewhat stuck in the past. I wonder what routine my friends have when I'm not here. Do they come to the stationery shop as well? Do they all hang out together every recess as well?
I love the fact that I feel perfectly (somewhat) content here.
I dislike it very much that everyone is in school and no one is online and I'm just deperately bored.
I dislike it very much that I don't have my driver's license yet. Very, very much. VERY much.
I love how familiar Tur's house is, and Pei's. I didn't get to go to Steph's house.
I absolutely LOVE how I can turn off the shower in between shampooing and conditioning etc. I would totally just bite my tongue off from shivering if I do that here. Sigh.
I love how you only get like one or two cars out of ten who put on their blinkers/signals when waiting to do a turn, when in Aus EVERY car has their blinkers on.
Sigh. I'm sorry.. I know. I've been pretty busy or caught up in stuff that I didn't get to posting this until NOW, when I'm one week back in Aus and sort of freaking out. To the next post to find out.
But regardless, regardless of all the flaws the people at home have, regardless of all the flaws my home has, regardless of all the flaws of everythinggggg back home, It Is Still Home and I smiled and laughed, and I loved. It's home.
Ok. Here're just some random statements and stuff about being back, some of which I only realize when I take a step back and really look and see. Enjoy!
I have to get used to sweating now. I'm so not used to it that when I sweat, I think it's hot. I can't play volleyball much or stay out in the sun much because the moment I start sweating, I'm saying that it's too hot when it's actually just normal temperature.
I love the heat. Well, not so much the heat itself. More like the fact that I'm wearing shorts and a t-shirt. When I was packing I almost forgot to pack my thongs (flip-flops! Not underwear!) because I haven't worn them in AGES (too cold). But I am undoubtedly not that used to it anymore. I used to be able to wear long-sleeved shirts here no problem. But now I can't imagine it AT ALL.
I love the whatever-you-call-it culture here. How friends and friends meet up for supper, have a cup of teh tarik and a packet of nasi lemak. How families go out for supper, have some roti kahwin and milo bing gao. How they just sit there for an hour or so and just chat and chat, in the ever-bustling shop, in the stuffy heat.
I have to get used to the fact that toilet paper is not provided here.
I love the soft thrumming of the ceiling fans as they turn. Together with the heat, they perfect the feel of home.
I am amazed at how it feels like it's been absolutely forever since I've been in my home. And how things have stayed the same, how I hardly think about my home when I'm down under, how familiar yet unfamiliar it seems. Amazed.
I feel like I'm somewhat stuck in the past. I wonder what routine my friends have when I'm not here. Do they come to the stationery shop as well? Do they all hang out together every recess as well?
I love the fact that I feel perfectly (somewhat) content here.
I dislike it very much that everyone is in school and no one is online and I'm just deperately bored.
I dislike it very much that I don't have my driver's license yet. Very, very much. VERY much.
I love how familiar Tur's house is, and Pei's. I didn't get to go to Steph's house.
I absolutely LOVE how I can turn off the shower in between shampooing and conditioning etc. I would totally just bite my tongue off from shivering if I do that here. Sigh.
I love how you only get like one or two cars out of ten who put on their blinkers/signals when waiting to do a turn, when in Aus EVERY car has their blinkers on.
Sigh. I'm sorry.. I know. I've been pretty busy or caught up in stuff that I didn't get to posting this until NOW, when I'm one week back in Aus and sort of freaking out. To the next post to find out.
But regardless, regardless of all the flaws the people at home have, regardless of all the flaws my home has, regardless of all the flaws of everythinggggg back home, It Is Still Home and I smiled and laughed, and I loved. It's home.
Thursday, June 24, 2010
So. STUPID.
I don't use that word often. I think that we shouldn't use that word, when our mental health is perfectly fine because we are so fortunate to not have congenital mental disabilities, or even non-congenital mental diseases. I made that decision a few years back.. like probably two years ago or something. But I do use it occasionally referring to myself. I always do cringe a little and feel guilty for using that word.
But let me tell you now, I'm so utterly frustrated and upset with my new school that I'm going to be moving to soon. And they. are. so. stupid. Why? LET ME TELL YOU WHY.
As most of you know, I'm doing one subject outside of school, that's Indonesian. Now usually all students take 6 subjects for VCE. So I'm currently doing 5 inside of school, and one during Saturdays. But now, this new school tells me that I have to do 6 subjects inside of school regardless that I'm taking one outside of school. That. is. just. simply. ri. di. cu. lous!!! So now I have to take 7 subjects! That's UNFAIR! The lady said that they have other students doing the same thing too. Well, all I can say is those students must be like, super hardworking or have no life or something. I enjoy my free periods. I like the quiet time I get in the library just doing my homework and everything. I've gotten so used to it, adjusted to it, embraced it. I don't know.. I'm so upset.
Then also, we have to do religious education which is compulsory. I'm not so bothered by the fact that we have to do rel. ed., but then, does that mean that I'll have NO FREEs whatsoever? In my current school, taking 6 subjects inside of school, you still have like 2 periods of free periods in a week. Designated frees. So then if we have rel. ed., then does that mean we have no frees? At all? What?! That just sounds like they have no control over their students and can't seem to discipline them or something. What happened to the privileges you get when you're a senior?
Then also, they seem to have very stupid blocks for the subject allocation thing. Each school arranges their classes in certain blocks. So each class you have is from a certain block. You can't go to two classes from the same block because that would mean you have the Time Turner (Harry Potter), but of course, most subjects have more than one class which are in different blocks. So they asked me to choose a stupid 7th subject. I said Accounting. But nooooo it clashes with English or whatever. Then I want General Maths B (which leads into Further Maths, the easier one), and noooo no one does three maths in their schools. So I picked Lit and I'm not very keen because I KNOW that no teacher can beat Ms. Touvoli. And I love my Lit class because the people in our class make the discussions we have so lively and funny and critical all at the same time.
So upset. You know how when you're upset and you tend to think about other things that make you sad and it just gets worse for no reason at all? Well yeah. Upset as in I'm this idiot who walked home from school crying. Crappy day. I have last two periods off today but it's report day. You get your report at 2.25pm at the end of the day and I asked if I could get my report early. But noooo we'll wag (play truant) the last two classes if we get it early. I don't even know why I started crying. I am just really unhappy about all the arrangements. I'm starting to feel that this school cannot accommodate me. What if I really want to go into Further Maths next year? That's 'impossible' as the lady put it. So stupid. Maybe I shouldn't have opted to change schools. I feel like I want to pull the plug but then I think of the money already paid. Then I think that maybe this is God's will or whatever.
Whatttttttt. Now I just have to concentrate on Jason Mraz' Every Little Thing, Is Gonna Be Alright.
But let me tell you now, I'm so utterly frustrated and upset with my new school that I'm going to be moving to soon. And they. are. so. stupid. Why? LET ME TELL YOU WHY.
As most of you know, I'm doing one subject outside of school, that's Indonesian. Now usually all students take 6 subjects for VCE. So I'm currently doing 5 inside of school, and one during Saturdays. But now, this new school tells me that I have to do 6 subjects inside of school regardless that I'm taking one outside of school. That. is. just. simply. ri. di. cu. lous!!! So now I have to take 7 subjects! That's UNFAIR! The lady said that they have other students doing the same thing too. Well, all I can say is those students must be like, super hardworking or have no life or something. I enjoy my free periods. I like the quiet time I get in the library just doing my homework and everything. I've gotten so used to it, adjusted to it, embraced it. I don't know.. I'm so upset.
Then also, we have to do religious education which is compulsory. I'm not so bothered by the fact that we have to do rel. ed., but then, does that mean that I'll have NO FREEs whatsoever? In my current school, taking 6 subjects inside of school, you still have like 2 periods of free periods in a week. Designated frees. So then if we have rel. ed., then does that mean we have no frees? At all? What?! That just sounds like they have no control over their students and can't seem to discipline them or something. What happened to the privileges you get when you're a senior?
Then also, they seem to have very stupid blocks for the subject allocation thing. Each school arranges their classes in certain blocks. So each class you have is from a certain block. You can't go to two classes from the same block because that would mean you have the Time Turner (Harry Potter), but of course, most subjects have more than one class which are in different blocks. So they asked me to choose a stupid 7th subject. I said Accounting. But nooooo it clashes with English or whatever. Then I want General Maths B (which leads into Further Maths, the easier one), and noooo no one does three maths in their schools. So I picked Lit and I'm not very keen because I KNOW that no teacher can beat Ms. Touvoli. And I love my Lit class because the people in our class make the discussions we have so lively and funny and critical all at the same time.
So upset. You know how when you're upset and you tend to think about other things that make you sad and it just gets worse for no reason at all? Well yeah. Upset as in I'm this idiot who walked home from school crying. Crappy day. I have last two periods off today but it's report day. You get your report at 2.25pm at the end of the day and I asked if I could get my report early. But noooo we'll wag (play truant) the last two classes if we get it early. I don't even know why I started crying. I am just really unhappy about all the arrangements. I'm starting to feel that this school cannot accommodate me. What if I really want to go into Further Maths next year? That's 'impossible' as the lady put it. So stupid. Maybe I shouldn't have opted to change schools. I feel like I want to pull the plug but then I think of the money already paid. Then I think that maybe this is God's will or whatever.
Whatttttttt. Now I just have to concentrate on Jason Mraz' Every Little Thing, Is Gonna Be Alright.
Tuesday, June 22, 2010
Update!
Ok. So I'm going to be changing schools. It's confirmed. I've got most of the uniforms (second hand! but seriously-no-kidding ugly. The winter uniform I mean). It's really bad. The winter uniform. ARGH! But I think the main reason is because I'm always wearing so many layers. I REALLY dislike it! For one, my skin is like dying from under exposure of the outside world. Seriously. I look so bulky and fat. It's so annoying! It's just uncomfortable. But all for the sake of keeping warm. Do you know how crazy I am? I wear TWO pairs of tights you know. TWO. WHO DOES THAT? HUH? WHO WEARS TWO PAIRS OF TIGHTS ONE ON TOP THE OTHER????????!?!?!?! Yea. But granted, the second pair of tights is like really thin. I'm such a sad person. Scoff at me. Anyway. The winter uniform. IT'S. A. PINAFORE! They call it a tunic (PFFTT Pretentious) but it's so a pinafore. And it's grey. And the worst is that we all wear GREY tights. GREY! WHO WEARS GREY TIGHTS??????!?!?! But yea. They're changing it next year, but I don't know, I might not buy it because it's not worth it for just a few months.
I'm pretty worried though. I'm not sure how tight they are (tight is an Australian term!!!!!!!!!! Just so you know (Jessie McCartney -.-) it means strict) on the uniforms. Like in my current school, we can wear navy/black tights/pants. Even girls can wear pants. We can wear winter uniforms during summer and vice versa. We can buy any white button-up shirt from Target or something and not get the school's official white shirt. So the thing is, when it's not summer here, it's still pretty cold. So if that's the case, can I wear my winter uniform or something then? When it's really cold, I sometimes wear a hoodie underneath my school jumper in my current school. That's actually not allowed. But they don't really bother. I don't think I'll be able to do that in my new school. Stressful!! The cold is horrible. HORRIBLE!
Anyway. I also realized something as I was in the shower. When I left my old school back home to come here to Australia, I was sad not because of my current school at that time, but because of all of my awesome friends there. But now, as I'm leaving this school, I'm sort of sad, not because of the friends there, but because of the school itself. It actually is a pretty good school. As in the system and everything. Granted, it is sort of an acknowledged 'geek' school, but IMO, that's better than a school full of bullying and 'bad stuff'. Ditto my blog name. -.- Haha.
Truly and sadly, I don't feel any real affection for anyone here in my school. Yes, I think some of them are really nice and really cool (definition of cool being my definition of cool, not cool cool. -.-). They are good people. There are good people. But when people hear I'm leaving they're like 'BUT WHY??????'. And I don't feel anything at all because I don't feel any affection for them, it's not like they even talk to me regularly, why would they care? Do you get what I mean? There are so many people who suddenly care when they hear about someone leaving or something like that. It's like how there's a farewell party for some random person and suddenly everyone starts caring because they want to be 'in the know', want to get invited or something. There are probably only about 3 people I really feel affection for, who I'm actually sort of sad to be leaving. Sum Sum, Janet and Silkra, this girl in my Chem class who is LEFT HANDED! =D I feel sort of bad because I'm really ditching Janet. I'm in her Chem and Methods class. We study together and stuff because we both are 'high achievers' *cough hak cough* and we sit beside each other and stuff. And we're prac partners in Chem. Sigh. But then I can't really do anything right?
Part of me is still silently asking questions, having doubts. As in, should I have just arranged a home stay and stay in the same school? Things like that? But then just as I mentioned before, I'm just going to follow it since I've been accepted. Sigh. Just go with it yea?
I think the class I'll miss the most will be Literature with Ms. Touvoli. She's cool!! Well, on one hand, Lit is like my relaxation class. It's the one class where it's not stressful and stuff. We mostly have very interesting discussions (most of which fly over my head, all of which I never contribute in), write practice responses or watch Literature movies. It's really fun! On the other hand, I really learnt a lot. It was tough, no kidding. (Don't know whether I've mentioned it before but oh well) We had to do this Reading Journal where we right down our opinions, thoughts, reactions etc on 10 texts we did (in two terms). At least two which were Australian, no more than two film texts, at least one poet, at least one from the 19th century and from the 20th century respectively and at least one play. It was really hard to try and write about them, about our thoughts and stuff. It really opened my eyes and forced me to construct another path of thought that I never had before. That's why I like Lit. Because I actually learnt those things. It challenged my choice of books (granted, it still wasn't that good because I didn't have much time) but then really. My world is just that much wider because of Lit. I'll miss Ms. Grant too. With her not-so-hilarious comments which loads don't really like. But coming from a school where not many teachers joked with you and stuff like that, it was cool.
ANYWAY. The lowest temperature is 1 degrees Celsius today. :O It was really cold this morning and night. Well.. I couldn't really feel the difference. Because I was dressed up like a fat penguin and wearing gloves and scarf and everything PFFTTT THE TORTURE! But then seeing as it was almost 11am and I could still see my breath, was proof that it was cold. And then tonight, (I went to work) and when I went out to collect Francesco, this statue-like thing of a butler-like guy with specs, in an apron and holding a tray, who is on wheels, and wheel him back into the shop, the moment I stepped out of the shop, I could see my breath. And when I stepped out of the shower, in the bathroom right there indoors, I could see my breath. Haha. Funny how I measure the cold with whether I can see my breath or not. So silly. So me. So geek. (Y) (how pathetic tsk tsk).
Well, sadly, the most exciting thing happening in my life right now is me looking forward to going back! SOON! If I say that one word, soon!, you know I'm talking about it. It's a surprise again. Not telling anyone the date. But it's soon! And I can't wait! I keep thinking about wearing shorts, not waking up freezing my ends off, not having to FORCE myself to wash my hands after the toilet because it's SO my-brain-is-going-to-explode-because-it-cannot-comprehend-it COLD!!!!!! ARGH! I can't wait to hear the soft thrumming of the CEILING FANS which I have come to absolutely love. I can't wait to lie on the smooth leather couch in the living room at home with a book in my hand. I can't wait to SEE ALL MY FRIENDS and hug them and look at their face in flesh, not through the laptop screen on Facebook. I can't wait To. Be. HOME!
Oh I got a raise from my job. Yea. Will talk more about it next time. Going to go to bed now. Tired. Take care! =D =D
SOOOONNNN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I'm pretty worried though. I'm not sure how tight they are (tight is an Australian term!!!!!!!!!! Just so you know (Jessie McCartney -.-) it means strict) on the uniforms. Like in my current school, we can wear navy/black tights/pants. Even girls can wear pants. We can wear winter uniforms during summer and vice versa. We can buy any white button-up shirt from Target or something and not get the school's official white shirt. So the thing is, when it's not summer here, it's still pretty cold. So if that's the case, can I wear my winter uniform or something then? When it's really cold, I sometimes wear a hoodie underneath my school jumper in my current school. That's actually not allowed. But they don't really bother. I don't think I'll be able to do that in my new school. Stressful!! The cold is horrible. HORRIBLE!
Anyway. I also realized something as I was in the shower. When I left my old school back home to come here to Australia, I was sad not because of my current school at that time, but because of all of my awesome friends there. But now, as I'm leaving this school, I'm sort of sad, not because of the friends there, but because of the school itself. It actually is a pretty good school. As in the system and everything. Granted, it is sort of an acknowledged 'geek' school, but IMO, that's better than a school full of bullying and 'bad stuff'. Ditto my blog name. -.- Haha.
Truly and sadly, I don't feel any real affection for anyone here in my school. Yes, I think some of them are really nice and really cool (definition of cool being my definition of cool, not cool cool. -.-). They are good people. There are good people. But when people hear I'm leaving they're like 'BUT WHY??????'. And I don't feel anything at all because I don't feel any affection for them, it's not like they even talk to me regularly, why would they care? Do you get what I mean? There are so many people who suddenly care when they hear about someone leaving or something like that. It's like how there's a farewell party for some random person and suddenly everyone starts caring because they want to be 'in the know', want to get invited or something. There are probably only about 3 people I really feel affection for, who I'm actually sort of sad to be leaving. Sum Sum, Janet and Silkra, this girl in my Chem class who is LEFT HANDED! =D I feel sort of bad because I'm really ditching Janet. I'm in her Chem and Methods class. We study together and stuff because we both are 'high achievers' *cough hak cough* and we sit beside each other and stuff. And we're prac partners in Chem. Sigh. But then I can't really do anything right?
Part of me is still silently asking questions, having doubts. As in, should I have just arranged a home stay and stay in the same school? Things like that? But then just as I mentioned before, I'm just going to follow it since I've been accepted. Sigh. Just go with it yea?
I think the class I'll miss the most will be Literature with Ms. Touvoli. She's cool!! Well, on one hand, Lit is like my relaxation class. It's the one class where it's not stressful and stuff. We mostly have very interesting discussions (most of which fly over my head, all of which I never contribute in), write practice responses or watch Literature movies. It's really fun! On the other hand, I really learnt a lot. It was tough, no kidding. (Don't know whether I've mentioned it before but oh well) We had to do this Reading Journal where we right down our opinions, thoughts, reactions etc on 10 texts we did (in two terms). At least two which were Australian, no more than two film texts, at least one poet, at least one from the 19th century and from the 20th century respectively and at least one play. It was really hard to try and write about them, about our thoughts and stuff. It really opened my eyes and forced me to construct another path of thought that I never had before. That's why I like Lit. Because I actually learnt those things. It challenged my choice of books (granted, it still wasn't that good because I didn't have much time) but then really. My world is just that much wider because of Lit. I'll miss Ms. Grant too. With her not-so-hilarious comments which loads don't really like. But coming from a school where not many teachers joked with you and stuff like that, it was cool.
ANYWAY. The lowest temperature is 1 degrees Celsius today. :O It was really cold this morning and night. Well.. I couldn't really feel the difference. Because I was dressed up like a fat penguin and wearing gloves and scarf and everything PFFTTT THE TORTURE! But then seeing as it was almost 11am and I could still see my breath, was proof that it was cold. And then tonight, (I went to work) and when I went out to collect Francesco, this statue-like thing of a butler-like guy with specs, in an apron and holding a tray, who is on wheels, and wheel him back into the shop, the moment I stepped out of the shop, I could see my breath. And when I stepped out of the shower, in the bathroom right there indoors, I could see my breath. Haha. Funny how I measure the cold with whether I can see my breath or not. So silly. So me. So geek. (Y) (how pathetic tsk tsk).
Well, sadly, the most exciting thing happening in my life right now is me looking forward to going back! SOON! If I say that one word, soon!, you know I'm talking about it. It's a surprise again. Not telling anyone the date. But it's soon! And I can't wait! I keep thinking about wearing shorts, not waking up freezing my ends off, not having to FORCE myself to wash my hands after the toilet because it's SO my-brain-is-going-to-explode-because-it-cannot-comprehend-it COLD!!!!!! ARGH! I can't wait to hear the soft thrumming of the CEILING FANS which I have come to absolutely love. I can't wait to lie on the smooth leather couch in the living room at home with a book in my hand. I can't wait to SEE ALL MY FRIENDS and hug them and look at their face in flesh, not through the laptop screen on Facebook. I can't wait To. Be. HOME!
Oh I got a raise from my job. Yea. Will talk more about it next time. Going to go to bed now. Tired. Take care! =D =D
SOOOONNNN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Sunday, June 13, 2010
Ideals.
Don't you think it's infinitely sad? It breaks my heart when I think about it, and of course, shades of fear and worry gnaw subtly and unrelentingly at my heart.
Ideals.
That's what makes me sad.
I think almost everyone starts out the same. In primary school/grade school, or preschool, for this matter, teachers ask kids what they want to be when they grow up. What are the answers? Doctors, policemen, firemen. But how foolish does it seem? In middle school, the answer would be the same, or a singer, celebrity. Then in high school, it'll be 'I Don't Know'. We're talking about a majority of people here.
Isn't it sad? We start out oh-so-innocent and foolish: doctors, policemen, firemen. But so, so many of us fall so far from our initial ideals. Think about it, when you were still in school, you imagined your future life. You would get a good job, meet some guy, get married and be happy. Normal. But then how many of us end up unemployed? How many of us end up in lowly situations we never thought ourselves to fall into before. We all thought that we would go on and do something we love to do, but how many of us end up being a shopkeeper of a carpet shop, living life day to day. Or we end up with two divorces in our baggage, with two children in tow or something like that.
You grew up in a close-knit family. But then one day you realize that you don't keep in touch with your siblings anymore.
This topic reminds me of the songs 'Losing My Way' by Justin Timberlake and 'Gone Going' by Black Eyed Peas.
This topic reminds me of the songs 'Losing My Way' by Justin Timberlake and 'Gone Going' by Black Eyed Peas.
I see homeless people on the street and believe it or not, this is what goes through my mind. I wonder what ideals they had when they were young? Did they start out like this, on the streets? Or were they like me, in school and everything. How did they end up here? Did they have ideals and aspirations, imagining themselves having a good job, living in a nice house with a great family? If so, did they stop and think, as they sat there in the streets with their palms upwards, about how so very far they have fallen from their ideals?
It once again casts the fear into my mind at how unexpected life is. We aim high, or at least I do. We aim to be doctors and dentists, think of us living comfortably, getting by with a job that we chose to have, wondering whether we'll get a good partner, whether we'll start a happy family. Especially when you are born into that particular type of family that influences your ideals, the images you have in your mind. A family full of professional degree holders, it either shapes your ideal in that same direction, thinking you would definitely be one of them as well, or being a rebel and going for what you really love, like art or something. But then bang you find yourself looking after this random laundry service, working 9-5 and wondering how in the world you ended up there.
Do you get what I'm trying to say? We think we're going to be a powerful lawyer, but we end up on the 'sexy single ladies' site. You just never know where you will end up in life. The road you're traveling on will twist and turn and.. you just suddenly realise you've slid down the snake instead of climbing up the ladder.
You just never know what you're going to meet, what influences are going to tower over you. That's why I think it is infinitely important to know what type of person you are. Not who you are. But what type of person you are, what you are actually aiming for in life, what direction you are headed towards.
What you want out of life.
Think about it guys. Stay safe! =)
Saturday, June 12, 2010
Presently. (3) *OH NO!*
Haha. Sorry guys. Looks like there's more to bear. As if anyone is still reading. They've probably ran off already. So really unexpectedly, when mum came here, the subject of changing schools came up again. This subject is not new. But then we really looked into boarding schools this time. And surprisingly, we went ahead and sent in an application to this Catholic private school. We went for the school tour and wow it looks awesome. At least from the outside though. The inside wasn't as nice as I expected a private school to be. Actually, it seemed pretty run down in some places. Well.. the thing is that mum was really worried about my school not having good teachers and stuff like that. And me? Well.. I'm not trying to brag or anything. Really. I'm just saying the case as it is. Like all my siblings went to private schools. So when I was preparing to leave home and come here, I thought that I would be going to a private school as well. But somehow, I ended up where I am now. I'm not really complaining. But it's just that I've always wanted to go to a boarding school, I've always wanted, wholeheartedly, to experience boarding school.
So yea. This whole topic has been going round and round in my head, and that's how our progress has been too. Yes.. then no. Then yes. At least in my head. Again and again. I detest dilemmas. I've had SO MANY of them. Even when I tell Dana 'I've got another dilemma' she's like 'AGAIN? OH NO!'. Haha. Horrible. But anyway. I was so scared and unsure. Well. To be honest, sadly, as you guys probably know, embarrassingly, (...) I'm not happy in my current school and YOU KNOW WHY. (Because this is the chronicles of my life (not really) (haha) I shall be thick skinned and pretend I don't feel the heat in my cheeks), I shall state the reason: THE friend factor. Sad huh? So yea. I'm not happy. But I'm not miserable. That's why I think that I have it pretty good already. I appreciate what I have, even though it's not perfect (hah, far from, more like), I'm still alive. I don't hate my school, I don't dread to go to school every day. That's not too bad.
But anyway. The application has been sent in. I'm going for an interview on Wednesday. So this is my take on it: if they accept me, then I'll take it as God's will. If they don't, then I don't. I've been praying for God to lead me in the right direction, for me to recognise His will. So that's what I've decided. I'll just go and cross my fingers. Everything has a reason, that's what I believe. Problem is sometimes it takes 10 years for you to recognise it. Oh well. Wish me luck. Is it shallow to say I want to go to a prestigious school? With nice uniforms and everything? Hah. If I get accepted in that school, I'll be wearing GREY tights. HAhahaaha *cries* Grey tights. Oh well. I'll also be commuting by tram to the school every day. A REAL BIG hassle. But I'm looking for a sense of community in a boarding house. Idealistic much? But put Gavin DeGraw's More Than Anyone in the background, and hear me saying that I'm just going to cross my fingers and hope, really hope, that I won't be a loner. I'm going to change the way I approach people. I've observed that if you just go up to them, not feeling unworthy as I constantly do, not feeling awkward as I constantly do, it's easier. The people here are accepting. Or so I hope. So.. cross fingers and trust God will guide me. Of course, if I do get accepted, I'm not going to be constantly comparing my current school with that school then. I'm going to look forward, not casting wistful glances over my shoulder. Or at least this is what I say now. But really.. I hope I won't be all regretful and stuff. What I say now though, is that I will take everything of that opportunity and not leave space for being wistful. No. (Y)
Next topic. You know I sometimes wear sweat pants to school because it's so cold or I'm just feeling lazy? Haha. Thanks to Gee, I haven't worn sweat pants to school now for ages! Seriously. You guys better go thank her. She said that I'm a loner because I don't dress properly. Hahaha. Well.. I'm a loner because I'm just socially awkward to people I don't know. But dressing properly. Well. I can't really disagree with that. Hahaha. So now I just always wear those darn tights (dislike them!) to school now. Thanks Gee. =D
Well.. the world cup just started yesterday. Me? I'm a basketball, volleyball, BADMINTON fan! Not so much soccer. Haha. It's held in South Africa this year. The FIFA Worldcup. Haha. Australia is in it.. the Socceroos. Hahaha I pronounce it as 'saucer-roos'. Oh well. Don't really hold much interest. BUT YOU KNOW WHY I'm such a loner? It's because I don't listen to the radio. Thus I don't know all the new songs. I don't watch Today Tonight or stuff like that. The new movies as well. I don't know anything. So I always have nothing to talk about.
Indo school. It's been pretty good. I went to the Indo Fest which was probably on the 2nd of May, Sunday. I went there and met up with Indo School friends, Mei, Adhy and Alwi. I had a pretty good time. It was fun. I really enjoyed their company and everything. Oh Mei and I.. we ate BEEF TONGUE!!!!!!!!!! SOB!!! SERIOUSLY! We were standing there (no seats left) eating and then Adhy and Alwi arrived and they walked over and asked 'how's the tongue' and told us they were going to the other stall to get satay. And Mei and I were just looking at each other. I initially thought that he meant how's our tongue.. referring to the chilli in the sauce or whatever. But then we were like.. contemplating. Is this tongue? It can't be. And stuff like that. We continued eating, but we kept stopping and looking at each other with meaningful looks. Haha. We walked over to Adhy and Alwi and asked them. They confirmed our assumptions. Well.. you can't really blame us. They were skewers as well! So we just assumed that it was normal satay. Sigh. Mei had to go to work in Box Hill soon after that (the festival was in Box Hill Town Hall). So I just hung out with them and chatted. We walked to Box Hill to look for Mei after that. We chatted a lot and it was pretty funny. How Adhy wants to get a motorcycle, explaining why he had those black gloves. So we were joking about him having a pink bike, with ribbons and rainbows on it. Haha. It was fun. Indonesians are cool, seriously!
I went out for a movie with them as well. Adhy, his sister Melina (in the Yr 12 Indo class who Michelle and I were classmates with for a while before we were kicked to Yr 11), and his other sister Nessa, Alwi and his younger sister who was friends with Nessa. We watched Iron Man 2! It was pretty good I guess. But of course, the first one was better. Well.. I don't think that it was as fun as the Indo Fest, but it was still pretty good. Adhy was so stressed out that we were late for the movie and everything because we were waiting for Alwi. But it was all good. It's fun. I really think that Indos are cool. I would really like to go to Indonesia someday. Someday. =D
Well... I think that this is all. Hopefully. As in this is all there is on the topic of 'presently'. I'll gradually fill you guys in. Oh and you know AGES ago I was complaining about the cold and said that Weatherzone shows all 20-something degrees for the whole week? Well.. I look at it now and it's all around 12 degrees. Awesome much? (sarcastic!!!!!)
Reminder for myself: (upcoming topics!) Ideals, youngest, books, refined.
So yea. This whole topic has been going round and round in my head, and that's how our progress has been too. Yes.. then no. Then yes. At least in my head. Again and again. I detest dilemmas. I've had SO MANY of them. Even when I tell Dana 'I've got another dilemma' she's like 'AGAIN? OH NO!'. Haha. Horrible. But anyway. I was so scared and unsure. Well. To be honest, sadly, as you guys probably know, embarrassingly, (...) I'm not happy in my current school and YOU KNOW WHY. (Because this is the chronicles of my life (not really) (haha) I shall be thick skinned and pretend I don't feel the heat in my cheeks), I shall state the reason: THE friend factor. Sad huh? So yea. I'm not happy. But I'm not miserable. That's why I think that I have it pretty good already. I appreciate what I have, even though it's not perfect (hah, far from, more like), I'm still alive. I don't hate my school, I don't dread to go to school every day. That's not too bad.
But anyway. The application has been sent in. I'm going for an interview on Wednesday. So this is my take on it: if they accept me, then I'll take it as God's will. If they don't, then I don't. I've been praying for God to lead me in the right direction, for me to recognise His will. So that's what I've decided. I'll just go and cross my fingers. Everything has a reason, that's what I believe. Problem is sometimes it takes 10 years for you to recognise it. Oh well. Wish me luck. Is it shallow to say I want to go to a prestigious school? With nice uniforms and everything? Hah. If I get accepted in that school, I'll be wearing GREY tights. HAhahaaha *cries* Grey tights. Oh well. I'll also be commuting by tram to the school every day. A REAL BIG hassle. But I'm looking for a sense of community in a boarding house. Idealistic much? But put Gavin DeGraw's More Than Anyone in the background, and hear me saying that I'm just going to cross my fingers and hope, really hope, that I won't be a loner. I'm going to change the way I approach people. I've observed that if you just go up to them, not feeling unworthy as I constantly do, not feeling awkward as I constantly do, it's easier. The people here are accepting. Or so I hope. So.. cross fingers and trust God will guide me. Of course, if I do get accepted, I'm not going to be constantly comparing my current school with that school then. I'm going to look forward, not casting wistful glances over my shoulder. Or at least this is what I say now. But really.. I hope I won't be all regretful and stuff. What I say now though, is that I will take everything of that opportunity and not leave space for being wistful. No. (Y)
Next topic. You know I sometimes wear sweat pants to school because it's so cold or I'm just feeling lazy? Haha. Thanks to Gee, I haven't worn sweat pants to school now for ages! Seriously. You guys better go thank her. She said that I'm a loner because I don't dress properly. Hahaha. Well.. I'm a loner because I'm just socially awkward to people I don't know. But dressing properly. Well. I can't really disagree with that. Hahaha. So now I just always wear those darn tights (dislike them!) to school now. Thanks Gee. =D
Well.. the world cup just started yesterday. Me? I'm a basketball, volleyball, BADMINTON fan! Not so much soccer. Haha. It's held in South Africa this year. The FIFA Worldcup. Haha. Australia is in it.. the Socceroos. Hahaha I pronounce it as 'saucer-roos'. Oh well. Don't really hold much interest. BUT YOU KNOW WHY I'm such a loner? It's because I don't listen to the radio. Thus I don't know all the new songs. I don't watch Today Tonight or stuff like that. The new movies as well. I don't know anything. So I always have nothing to talk about.
Indo school. It's been pretty good. I went to the Indo Fest which was probably on the 2nd of May, Sunday. I went there and met up with Indo School friends, Mei, Adhy and Alwi. I had a pretty good time. It was fun. I really enjoyed their company and everything. Oh Mei and I.. we ate BEEF TONGUE!!!!!!!!!! SOB!!! SERIOUSLY! We were standing there (no seats left) eating and then Adhy and Alwi arrived and they walked over and asked 'how's the tongue' and told us they were going to the other stall to get satay. And Mei and I were just looking at each other. I initially thought that he meant how's our tongue.. referring to the chilli in the sauce or whatever. But then we were like.. contemplating. Is this tongue? It can't be. And stuff like that. We continued eating, but we kept stopping and looking at each other with meaningful looks. Haha. We walked over to Adhy and Alwi and asked them. They confirmed our assumptions. Well.. you can't really blame us. They were skewers as well! So we just assumed that it was normal satay. Sigh. Mei had to go to work in Box Hill soon after that (the festival was in Box Hill Town Hall). So I just hung out with them and chatted. We walked to Box Hill to look for Mei after that. We chatted a lot and it was pretty funny. How Adhy wants to get a motorcycle, explaining why he had those black gloves. So we were joking about him having a pink bike, with ribbons and rainbows on it. Haha. It was fun. Indonesians are cool, seriously!
I went out for a movie with them as well. Adhy, his sister Melina (in the Yr 12 Indo class who Michelle and I were classmates with for a while before we were kicked to Yr 11), and his other sister Nessa, Alwi and his younger sister who was friends with Nessa. We watched Iron Man 2! It was pretty good I guess. But of course, the first one was better. Well.. I don't think that it was as fun as the Indo Fest, but it was still pretty good. Adhy was so stressed out that we were late for the movie and everything because we were waiting for Alwi. But it was all good. It's fun. I really think that Indos are cool. I would really like to go to Indonesia someday. Someday. =D
Well... I think that this is all. Hopefully. As in this is all there is on the topic of 'presently'. I'll gradually fill you guys in. Oh and you know AGES ago I was complaining about the cold and said that Weatherzone shows all 20-something degrees for the whole week? Well.. I look at it now and it's all around 12 degrees. Awesome much? (sarcastic!!!!!)
Reminder for myself: (upcoming topics!) Ideals, youngest, books, refined.
Presently. (2)
School. Well, we just had exams. But now I feel like I'm on holiday. Exams were pretty okay, but I feel like I could have done better. No wait, I KNOW that I could have done better. I guess it's because I was so busy with the two Methods SACs that we had on the week that exams started. Exams started on Fridays, it was pretty hectic. But, the finger is still pointed at me, regardless. I got 92 for Chem, 93 for AGM paper 1 and 91 for AGM paper 2. I don't think it's that good, at least from my own perspective. No excuses. Oh well. I got 16/20 for the literature exam, which was a written response on the topic you chose. I chose the topic that was about how our contemporary society changes the reactions we have on A Doll's House. Or something like that. I guess that wasn't too bad.
Ok. So far, we've had two Methods SACs. The first one which was on Chapters 1-3, I did well. Thanks to Chris, the really pro smart VCE student (my lifesaver guy!) who is in Melbourne Uni now and tutoring students for $35 an hour (HEARTACHE!!!!!! Mahal lahhhhh). He helped me over MSN with the stupid questions I had. Thank goodness! Haha. I got full marks for the first SAC. That's a good start. But then the second one. Imagine the Empire State Building crumbling down. Ok.. I guess it wasn't THAT bad, but to me, it was realllyyyy reallllllllyyyyyyyyyyy bad. It started my totally disgusting comfort food mania. So for the SAC, it was initially supposed to be an application task thing. So it was supposed to be those project type of things where you have to do research and everything. But then the teachers decided to make it into a normal test-like SAC, but splitting it up into three parts. So the first part was on Functions, the second was Logs and Exponentials, and the third and last one was on Trigonometry. And they were all extended response questions.
Let me tell you, the first part was absolutely horrible. It would be the first, and hopefully last time I mess up a test THAT bad. It was really, really bad. We got three questions for the first part (extended response!). And I didn't finish. Didn't finish. Didn't finish. And no it wasn't like I missed out one or two, I didn't finish a WHOLE QUESTION. Which was like what.. 14 marks out of 30 or 35? I'm actually not exactly sure. But then because I couldn't get the equation in the first place, I couldn't move on to the next questions. Because it was all calculator-based, and I just forgot how to do that particular thing in the graphics calculator. I forgot that you could actually do that! Point fingers at myself, because if I studied properly, like REALLY properly, I would have come across that. Sigh. So yea. A whole question blank. It was really bad. Really, really bad. I walked out wanting to hide in a corner and cry. That was how bad it was. Then I started eating loads of Twix and everything. Comfort food.
The second part, at least I sort of finished. I'm not too sure whether I got them all right though. Because it was calculator-based, most of the answers were all in decimal places, and you know how with those type of answers, you could easily be wrong and not know it? Sigh. Oh well. The third part was HARD! There was so much to do! Crazy! I didn't really finish but for that, I think I tried my best. It was too long. We haven't gotten the results back yet, and I'm not sure whether I want to know. It's so horrible. I don't want to think about it. Just want to shove it to the back of my head where it can never be found again. Hah. As if.
Next. I've gained weight. Well.. maybe not. But I feel really unhealthy. Seriously. With all that Twix and the really stupid food I've been eating, I feel so horrible! And plus, because of the cold weather, I do things often sluggishly and I don't feel like walking to the library which is my only form of exercise. Kind of sad. Especially now I go to McDonalds every Friday with everyone after Fungus. Tsk tsk tsk. I feel so horrible. No more Twix, no more Pods, no more McDonalds for me for a while now. Abstinence. Haha.
Oh yea. Holiday. Why do I feel like I'm on a holiday? Last week, we had exams, so that means we didn't have Yr 11 classes. Then this week, the mid-year exams were on. As in the VCE mid-years, not the schools. So we didn't have any Yr 12 classes. Especially since I'm doing Indonesian outside of school, I have more frees. So I've been going to school at like 10am or something and coming out at 12. Haha. Then also, mum is here. YAY!!!!!!!!!! Seriously. I mean it wholeheartedly that she's like gravity. As soon as she arrived, she's been pulling us back upright, to where we are supposed to be. Like the house is clean, we've been having proper food and everything. Our study rooms are tidier and stuff. Gravity man (Y). So yea. Normally, I would spend time in the library and everything, with the awesome amount of frees I'm having. But because she's here, I go back to the house and everything. And then of course I spend a lot of time NOW catching up with lost times blogging. Sadness! So yea. For two weeks now, I haven't touched any work. :O Tomorrow I shall start working hard. Pfft. But I'll probably have work. I haven't worked at all this week you know! Hah. No incentive too, except for the money. Haha. I'm pretty sure Mohammad sort of dislikes me and wants to fire me. OH WELL. BUT, I should actually focus on the money. Really. I'm saving up for traveling funds! YEA! Save save save! (Now I curse myself for slacking off with my job..... MEGA SIGH).
The worst part is, I start normal classes next week. SIGH. And I haven't done any work AT ALL. No more exams or extra frees. WISTFUL.
Ok. Keep going. Kel's birthday! HUA HUA HUA. I put a lot of effort into her birthday. It was a bit disappointing actually, but it all worked out in the end (thanks God!). So when her birthday was coming up, I was thinking a lot about it. Then the day before her birthday, can you believe that I actually forgot? Well.. it wasn't really a forgot, just didn't remember. Slight difference! Haha. Kat texted me asking me what I was going to do or what I was getting her and I was like ARGHHHHH (as Miss Grant puts it,) FUGGLENUTS! I was so annoyed then. I started planning everything in my head. I wanted to cook her dinner. A good, birthday dinner.
So the next day, I think it was a Friday, I rode my bicycle to school. Oh wait! I woke up extra early! I intended it to be like an hour or half an hour earlier or something, but I ended up waking up only less than half an hour before my usual time. I think. I don't remember actually. THEN, I used WHITE WINGS to bake a brownie cake for her. Wasn't that successful. But still the chocolate was nice! Well.. I was really in a rush and because I wanted to hide the cake, I chucked it under the pantry, in the lower shelf. Hahaha. I was late to school then. But oh well. Yes, I rode my rotting (not literally) bicycle to school because I was late. Then at lunch which lasts for about an hour, I rode to Box Hill to buy stuff that I needed for her birthday dinner. I had a free period next, so I had about two hours. I bought this huge heavy cabbage, a container of tofu, chicken pieces from the butcher, and asked the butcher to mince some of those chicken pieces, bought those packets of instant sauces as well because I'm a lousy cook. Haha.
So yes, with those REALLY heavy stuff in my backpack, I started back. Because I still had about half an hour or more, I went back home to deposit the items. Haha. It was tiring. The cabbage was like bulging out of my bag and it hurt my back, plus is was sort of drizzling! All for Kelly. Haha. (Worth it!). Then when I got back home, I started cutting up the ingredients. The chicken pieces (DISGUSTING!!!!! ARGH!), the mushrooms we had at home, and the cabbage (SOB!). Then I put everything away and rushed back to school. Power walked to the lockers, grabbed my pencil case and went to my Methods class for a Trig topic test. So I literally got into the classroom and sat down and started the test and walked back out to go home. I had work at 4pm, so I had less than an hour to do more stuff. Cut up more stuff and then went to work.
It was pretty horrible at work. Kat came back to the house, she brought two slices of cake from the Crown Bakery. But then Kel said she's not coming home for dinner which TOTALLY CRUSHED ME! Imagine the garlic pounder (the stone thingy that kakak always uses) pounding my heart. I was sooooo crushed. Then I asked her not to eat dinner and everything and asked her to have a nice dinner at home when she comes back. Which was like at 11pm or maybe later than that. Sadly, Kat went back to college. I felt SO UTTERLY IMMENSELY bad that she traveled all that way for nothing, just to drop of some cake. =( Sadness! But oh well. So I got home at 10pm and made sure I had everything. It was one of those stressed moments like I have during exams, where all I do is stand there and think. I think about what I'm going to do, what I have to do, what I need to remind myself, the sequence of those I need to do. At those moments, I imagine white hair sprouting on my head. Haha. What a horrible image. Oh well. It generally happens when I use my brain. Haha.
So at like 10.30 or 11 or something, I started cooking. Stupid cabbage! The sauce I used, honey chicken sauce, was absolutely horrible! It tasted weird! Granted, it was for chicken, but then I often use instant sauces with stuff that they weren't supposed to be for. So fail man! I didn't touch that dish. Thank goodness cabbage wasn't one of the special dishes that Kel likes. I cooked the cabbage with mushrooms (those normal white mushrooms, not the canned ones). Totally wasted mushrooms. Then I cooked a plain mushroom dish with garlic and pepper. Kel likes mushrooms. Then I cooked lemon chicken as well. Kel likes lemon chicken. (Y) And let me tell you. Lemon chicken = coating the chicken with flour and deep frying it. No experience in deep frying but I survived. And plus, it was SO GOOD! Yummy! Of course, instant sauce packet. But still. Applause yo! Then there was also TOFU! The main dish was TOFU with minced chicken. It was SO YUMMY!!!! With instant sauce (hangs head in shame) but. SO YUMMY! I was totally multitasking man! Seriously! I was cooking like two items or more in one go, AND cooking rice at the same time (HAHA as if. The rice cooks itself in the rice cooker.. >:P). I ALMOST FORGOT to take the cake out, believe it or not. The cake was so HARD! But oh well, it served its purpose as a birthday cake, who cares.
PFFT. Guess what? I ended up eating the brownie cake. The whole thing. Not at once of course GOSH, but yea. The cake with ice cream. And when mum left, she left apple pie here too and I was the one who finished that as well. With ice cream. And Kat's cake? Same. I ended up finishing it. In a period of one/two months. Sadness man. And you ask me why I complain I'm unhealthy? THIS IS YOUR EVIDENCE! D:< So yea. There we were, eating rice and stuff at almost 12 midnight. Oh well. So yes, in the end everything turned out well. Oh ya, Kev bought Angostura Lemon Lime and Bitters pre-mixed drinks, which Kel loves. OH YA. Almost forgot. The day before her birthday right, at 10pm, Kev had to go to the 24 hours Coles to get white bread for me. I boiled eggs and made Kel EGG MAYO sandwich, which I've never made before and haven't had in AGES myself. Sniff. I should have been making them for myself. Haha. I made them for Kel and glad-wrapped them for her lunch on her birthday. Pfft. She didn't even eat it. She left it in the fridge in her office. SNIFF MAN! That was special. An Egg Mayo sandwich that is an absolutely rare commodity in our life! It's like seeing a humpback whale breach. That's how rare and special it is. D:<
Oh well. Kel is 22. Can you believe that? We're all getting so old. I'm going to be EIGHTEEN!!!!!!! ARGH! How unfair. That's next year though. But still. HAPPY BIRTHDAY KEL! Hope you had a good one! =D LOVE YOU! Oh, and all this happened on the 7th of May, 2010. =D 4th of May, Dad's birthday! I sent him a nice text! =D 9th of May, Mothers' Day. I called up mum on Skype. =D All these things (excluding Kel's birthday, that's a BIG thing.. hmm going to be hard to top that OH NO) may seem small, but they are filled with my sincerity. I hope all of you know that. =D
Oh and just an additional fact. I usually work about 6 hours. 4pm-10pm. I used to work 8 hours too on Sat or Suns, it depends on what Mohammad asks. From 2pm-10pm. But then I don't anymore. All for the best. Oh well. I have to keep on his good side. Focus on the money! Save for my traveling fund!!!!!!!
I think that's about all I can think of. FOR NOW. I'm sure everyone is like 'YAY FINALLY! THE END!'. Glad for you guys. Haha. Oh wait. No. NEXT POST!
Ok. So far, we've had two Methods SACs. The first one which was on Chapters 1-3, I did well. Thanks to Chris, the really pro smart VCE student (my lifesaver guy!) who is in Melbourne Uni now and tutoring students for $35 an hour (HEARTACHE!!!!!! Mahal lahhhhh). He helped me over MSN with the stupid questions I had. Thank goodness! Haha. I got full marks for the first SAC. That's a good start. But then the second one. Imagine the Empire State Building crumbling down. Ok.. I guess it wasn't THAT bad, but to me, it was realllyyyy reallllllllyyyyyyyyyyy bad. It started my totally disgusting comfort food mania. So for the SAC, it was initially supposed to be an application task thing. So it was supposed to be those project type of things where you have to do research and everything. But then the teachers decided to make it into a normal test-like SAC, but splitting it up into three parts. So the first part was on Functions, the second was Logs and Exponentials, and the third and last one was on Trigonometry. And they were all extended response questions.
Let me tell you, the first part was absolutely horrible. It would be the first, and hopefully last time I mess up a test THAT bad. It was really, really bad. We got three questions for the first part (extended response!). And I didn't finish. Didn't finish. Didn't finish. And no it wasn't like I missed out one or two, I didn't finish a WHOLE QUESTION. Which was like what.. 14 marks out of 30 or 35? I'm actually not exactly sure. But then because I couldn't get the equation in the first place, I couldn't move on to the next questions. Because it was all calculator-based, and I just forgot how to do that particular thing in the graphics calculator. I forgot that you could actually do that! Point fingers at myself, because if I studied properly, like REALLY properly, I would have come across that. Sigh. So yea. A whole question blank. It was really bad. Really, really bad. I walked out wanting to hide in a corner and cry. That was how bad it was. Then I started eating loads of Twix and everything. Comfort food.
The second part, at least I sort of finished. I'm not too sure whether I got them all right though. Because it was calculator-based, most of the answers were all in decimal places, and you know how with those type of answers, you could easily be wrong and not know it? Sigh. Oh well. The third part was HARD! There was so much to do! Crazy! I didn't really finish but for that, I think I tried my best. It was too long. We haven't gotten the results back yet, and I'm not sure whether I want to know. It's so horrible. I don't want to think about it. Just want to shove it to the back of my head where it can never be found again. Hah. As if.
Next. I've gained weight. Well.. maybe not. But I feel really unhealthy. Seriously. With all that Twix and the really stupid food I've been eating, I feel so horrible! And plus, because of the cold weather, I do things often sluggishly and I don't feel like walking to the library which is my only form of exercise. Kind of sad. Especially now I go to McDonalds every Friday with everyone after Fungus. Tsk tsk tsk. I feel so horrible. No more Twix, no more Pods, no more McDonalds for me for a while now. Abstinence. Haha.
Oh yea. Holiday. Why do I feel like I'm on a holiday? Last week, we had exams, so that means we didn't have Yr 11 classes. Then this week, the mid-year exams were on. As in the VCE mid-years, not the schools. So we didn't have any Yr 12 classes. Especially since I'm doing Indonesian outside of school, I have more frees. So I've been going to school at like 10am or something and coming out at 12. Haha. Then also, mum is here. YAY!!!!!!!!!! Seriously. I mean it wholeheartedly that she's like gravity. As soon as she arrived, she's been pulling us back upright, to where we are supposed to be. Like the house is clean, we've been having proper food and everything. Our study rooms are tidier and stuff. Gravity man (Y). So yea. Normally, I would spend time in the library and everything, with the awesome amount of frees I'm having. But because she's here, I go back to the house and everything. And then of course I spend a lot of time NOW catching up with lost times blogging. Sadness! So yea. For two weeks now, I haven't touched any work. :O Tomorrow I shall start working hard. Pfft. But I'll probably have work. I haven't worked at all this week you know! Hah. No incentive too, except for the money. Haha. I'm pretty sure Mohammad sort of dislikes me and wants to fire me. OH WELL. BUT, I should actually focus on the money. Really. I'm saving up for traveling funds! YEA! Save save save! (Now I curse myself for slacking off with my job..... MEGA SIGH).
The worst part is, I start normal classes next week. SIGH. And I haven't done any work AT ALL. No more exams or extra frees. WISTFUL.
Ok. Keep going. Kel's birthday! HUA HUA HUA. I put a lot of effort into her birthday. It was a bit disappointing actually, but it all worked out in the end (thanks God!). So when her birthday was coming up, I was thinking a lot about it. Then the day before her birthday, can you believe that I actually forgot? Well.. it wasn't really a forgot, just didn't remember. Slight difference! Haha. Kat texted me asking me what I was going to do or what I was getting her and I was like ARGHHHHH (as Miss Grant puts it,) FUGGLENUTS! I was so annoyed then. I started planning everything in my head. I wanted to cook her dinner. A good, birthday dinner.
So the next day, I think it was a Friday, I rode my bicycle to school. Oh wait! I woke up extra early! I intended it to be like an hour or half an hour earlier or something, but I ended up waking up only less than half an hour before my usual time. I think. I don't remember actually. THEN, I used WHITE WINGS to bake a brownie cake for her. Wasn't that successful. But still the chocolate was nice! Well.. I was really in a rush and because I wanted to hide the cake, I chucked it under the pantry, in the lower shelf. Hahaha. I was late to school then. But oh well. Yes, I rode my rotting (not literally) bicycle to school because I was late. Then at lunch which lasts for about an hour, I rode to Box Hill to buy stuff that I needed for her birthday dinner. I had a free period next, so I had about two hours. I bought this huge heavy cabbage, a container of tofu, chicken pieces from the butcher, and asked the butcher to mince some of those chicken pieces, bought those packets of instant sauces as well because I'm a lousy cook. Haha.
So yes, with those REALLY heavy stuff in my backpack, I started back. Because I still had about half an hour or more, I went back home to deposit the items. Haha. It was tiring. The cabbage was like bulging out of my bag and it hurt my back, plus is was sort of drizzling! All for Kelly. Haha. (Worth it!). Then when I got back home, I started cutting up the ingredients. The chicken pieces (DISGUSTING!!!!! ARGH!), the mushrooms we had at home, and the cabbage (SOB!). Then I put everything away and rushed back to school. Power walked to the lockers, grabbed my pencil case and went to my Methods class for a Trig topic test. So I literally got into the classroom and sat down and started the test and walked back out to go home. I had work at 4pm, so I had less than an hour to do more stuff. Cut up more stuff and then went to work.
It was pretty horrible at work. Kat came back to the house, she brought two slices of cake from the Crown Bakery. But then Kel said she's not coming home for dinner which TOTALLY CRUSHED ME! Imagine the garlic pounder (the stone thingy that kakak always uses) pounding my heart. I was sooooo crushed. Then I asked her not to eat dinner and everything and asked her to have a nice dinner at home when she comes back. Which was like at 11pm or maybe later than that. Sadly, Kat went back to college. I felt SO UTTERLY IMMENSELY bad that she traveled all that way for nothing, just to drop of some cake. =( Sadness! But oh well. So I got home at 10pm and made sure I had everything. It was one of those stressed moments like I have during exams, where all I do is stand there and think. I think about what I'm going to do, what I have to do, what I need to remind myself, the sequence of those I need to do. At those moments, I imagine white hair sprouting on my head. Haha. What a horrible image. Oh well. It generally happens when I use my brain. Haha.
So at like 10.30 or 11 or something, I started cooking. Stupid cabbage! The sauce I used, honey chicken sauce, was absolutely horrible! It tasted weird! Granted, it was for chicken, but then I often use instant sauces with stuff that they weren't supposed to be for. So fail man! I didn't touch that dish. Thank goodness cabbage wasn't one of the special dishes that Kel likes. I cooked the cabbage with mushrooms (those normal white mushrooms, not the canned ones). Totally wasted mushrooms. Then I cooked a plain mushroom dish with garlic and pepper. Kel likes mushrooms. Then I cooked lemon chicken as well. Kel likes lemon chicken. (Y) And let me tell you. Lemon chicken = coating the chicken with flour and deep frying it. No experience in deep frying but I survived. And plus, it was SO GOOD! Yummy! Of course, instant sauce packet. But still. Applause yo! Then there was also TOFU! The main dish was TOFU with minced chicken. It was SO YUMMY!!!! With instant sauce (hangs head in shame) but. SO YUMMY! I was totally multitasking man! Seriously! I was cooking like two items or more in one go, AND cooking rice at the same time (HAHA as if. The rice cooks itself in the rice cooker.. >:P). I ALMOST FORGOT to take the cake out, believe it or not. The cake was so HARD! But oh well, it served its purpose as a birthday cake, who cares.
PFFT. Guess what? I ended up eating the brownie cake. The whole thing. Not at once of course GOSH, but yea. The cake with ice cream. And when mum left, she left apple pie here too and I was the one who finished that as well. With ice cream. And Kat's cake? Same. I ended up finishing it. In a period of one/two months. Sadness man. And you ask me why I complain I'm unhealthy? THIS IS YOUR EVIDENCE! D:< So yea. There we were, eating rice and stuff at almost 12 midnight. Oh well. So yes, in the end everything turned out well. Oh ya, Kev bought Angostura Lemon Lime and Bitters pre-mixed drinks, which Kel loves. OH YA. Almost forgot. The day before her birthday right, at 10pm, Kev had to go to the 24 hours Coles to get white bread for me. I boiled eggs and made Kel EGG MAYO sandwich, which I've never made before and haven't had in AGES myself. Sniff. I should have been making them for myself. Haha. I made them for Kel and glad-wrapped them for her lunch on her birthday. Pfft. She didn't even eat it. She left it in the fridge in her office. SNIFF MAN! That was special. An Egg Mayo sandwich that is an absolutely rare commodity in our life! It's like seeing a humpback whale breach. That's how rare and special it is. D:<
Oh well. Kel is 22. Can you believe that? We're all getting so old. I'm going to be EIGHTEEN!!!!!!! ARGH! How unfair. That's next year though. But still. HAPPY BIRTHDAY KEL! Hope you had a good one! =D LOVE YOU! Oh, and all this happened on the 7th of May, 2010. =D 4th of May, Dad's birthday! I sent him a nice text! =D 9th of May, Mothers' Day. I called up mum on Skype. =D All these things (excluding Kel's birthday, that's a BIG thing.. hmm going to be hard to top that OH NO) may seem small, but they are filled with my sincerity. I hope all of you know that. =D
Oh and just an additional fact. I usually work about 6 hours. 4pm-10pm. I used to work 8 hours too on Sat or Suns, it depends on what Mohammad asks. From 2pm-10pm. But then I don't anymore. All for the best. Oh well. I have to keep on his good side. Focus on the money! Save for my traveling fund!!!!!!!
I think that's about all I can think of. FOR NOW. I'm sure everyone is like 'YAY FINALLY! THE END!'. Glad for you guys. Haha. Oh wait. No. NEXT POST!
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