25th

and i'm stressed. 2 more weeks to uec mock. and i saw pauline studying chi hist today. form 1 text book. and i started to feel the stress coming onto me. and she asked a question out loud. and a classmate (called kelly) answered in detail. how am i supposed to know all that? i cant read a page in a story book without feeling sleepy. i remember i once tried reading a chi story book in borders and i fell asleep. ON THE FLOOR. i know that in these 2 weeks, there will be a day when i will cry bcz i'm overwhelmed. but then. i never thoguht it was going to be easy. but i never thought that chi hist would get to me so much. i know i'm prepared for a C for my chi. so what am i supposed to tell my heart about what i'm gonna get for chi hist? and uec sci. ive done the whole book of past year questions and i dont want it to be a waste. so i'm reading it again. but do i really have time? will my brain hold it all?

i watched greys anatomy that day and burke (the surgeon) just lost a patient on the op table. and he was sad and litsening to a concerto song or smth like that in a dark room on a bed. and christina (his girlfriend) came in and hugged him. and he said. when he was in college he had a note stuck onto his mirror. it was from the composer of the song he was listening to. the note said: what i lack in talent, i make up in discipline. and he said to christina. i'm not like you. i wasnt the smartest or the brightest in class. but i was the best. i was the best.

is that what i'm supposed to do about chi? i did try before. but not hard enough? i think the chances are so small that i study the right thing in a subject so so broad (chi and chi hist) so i choose not to waste time on it? but i cant not care. i'm working on my chinese. but what about chi hist? kel! did you study the workbook or things like that?

and the funny thing is now i'm studying hard, i tend to watch more tv. and i usually dont watch cz its boring. sigh. i dotn know.

but i guess its good in a way. cz i'm angry and stresed and so so annoyed abt chi hist that i'll study faster. but not in a good mood. haha.

SO MUCH TO DO SO LITTLE TIME! ok. ive gotta be more positive. *always look on the bright side of life*.. and mayhem is beautiful? it depends whether you can keep your head on and do smth about it. unlike me who is just complaining. sheesh. goona study sci now. dont wanna waste my long long effort of doing the whole book of past year.

THANK GOODNESS its hari raya next week. holiday. which means. whole day of studying?

oh ya. janice! i forgot to add in the friend post that. good luck in everything, and i hope you find success in being a singer. hahahaha!! dreams are achievable! =) and stop being horny.

and THANKS SO MUCH for agreeing to help me in maths and physics. we start today 3rd res\cess! thanks and good luck to us!

next post will be allllllllll about kel. =)